My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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