as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize