Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
