We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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