Having a random hookup so left but love u
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
