You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i dont even know how to be here
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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