Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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