i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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