New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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