It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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