Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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