I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So vagazzling was a success
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
