I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
it glows. i had to have it.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Never joke about your clitoris.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
