3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
