Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
