I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
