hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
