hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
