If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
