this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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