I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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