hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The adults are the big ones right?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
