Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Say something about gay babies.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
