I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
