Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
