if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.