I think I died a long time ago.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
