It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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