I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
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A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
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But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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