Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
