I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
