the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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