Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
