I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
