i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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