Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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