DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Randomize
