it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
