i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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