Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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