dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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