I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
