i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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