Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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