i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NoShamevember. You game?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize