If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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