Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
