just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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