I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the liver wants what the liver wants
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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