so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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